WENDELL H. SLABAUGH Oregon Slate University Corvall8s. 97331
Inside Information Four young chemists a t a convention were indulging in small talk when one of them stopped into a nearby phone booth. Within earshot of the remaining trio, the following conversation took place: "Is this Dean Blankum speaking? . . Well, Dean, this is Dr. Joe Snorkel of Harwood University. I hear you might he interested in hiring a new super-cooled physical chemist and I'd like to apply for the joh . . . Sir? You say you already have a super-cooled physical chemist? . . . I s that so? Is he already on tenure? . . . Well, then you must he quite satisfied with his work and aren't thinking of making a change? . . .Well, that's all, thank you Dean." "If you're looking for a new job," said one of his friends who overheard the call, "there's an opening at Podunk Community College.'' "No," replied the caller, "I got a job. That's the Dean I work for. I was just checking up on myself."
.
When you start to manufacture and throw hot potatoes at others, then you can he a dean.
Pocket Calculator-Truck
Size
This is no joke. Charles Bahhage (1792-1871). mathematician and computer logic and technology expert, had designed and built his "Difference Engine No. One" in the 1840's. This mechanical hehemoth could handle 20-decimal numbers with sixthorder differences, extract square and cube roots, and print out the answers. Bahhage later designed a 50-decimal number "analytical engine," hut it never got beyond the blueprint stage. The heart of this machine, called the mill, contained 50,000 wheels and 1000 axles and would have delivered printed or punched card answers. Funds to continue this machine were never obtained. The ensuing electronic age has, of course, reduced the size of the calculator to the ubiquitous student's device. Bahbage, however, pioneered the concept of computer logic and the clever little pocket calculators we now take for granted were preceded by machines over 100 years ago.
More New Math Academic Rank If someone throws you a hot potato and you drop it you are admitted to graduate school. If someone throws you a hot potato and you catch it, you will he promoted to assistant professor. If you throw the hot potato to someone else you have become a professor. If you salt and butter the hot potato and eat it you make a good department chairman.
The farmer died and left 19 horses to his three sons, the horses to he divided by mutual agreement. A horse was borrowed from a neighbor, making a total of 20 horses. Half, or ten horses went to son A, one-fourth or 5 horses went to son B, and one-fifth or 4 horses went to son c. Now, 10 5 4 = 19, so one horse was left over which was kindly returned to the good neighbor.
+ +
Volume 55, Number 3, March 1978 I 191
