VOL.6, No. 12
THE CHEMISTRY STUDENT
2263
Awards The best contribution received will be awarded a prize of five dollars and will be printed in the JOURNAL. The five next best papers will receive awards of one dollar each and the names of the winners will be published. Contributions will be judged on the basis of: 1. Correctness from a chemical standpoint 2. Neatness and correctness of drawing 3. English 4. Neatness and legibility of manuscript. Papers which do not comply with all of the rules of the contest will not be considered.
WHICH WITCH IS WHICH
An Exorcism in Three Gasps Scene-A
University Laboratory
Round about th' equation go, I n the differentials throw; Factors which assumption rules, Based on spheric molecules. Fir the pH sharp and wellNaught of other ions tell, Close your eyes, so you can't see Effects of an impurity. Then estimate, and calculateThe differentials integrate. Quote formulas of Nernst and Stokes (Though here invoked thcy seem like jokes), Combine snd hlend with your rcsuit* Sneer a t the critics' kecn insults, Teach marks-men, who, whate'er you tell, Have hollow heads t o echo wcll.
Cxonus
OF
Px.D.'s
If you would see Truth, as in dreams of your youth, Pledge your faith t o fair Truth's only scion,
If radicals reason, refute their foul treason. Be loyal to HYDROGEN ION! Shun chlorides and citratcs, and hromides, and nitrates, For their rule is misleading and meanH-IONis King, and he rules everythingHYDROXYL we praise as his Queen!
CHORUS
OB
HARD-BOILED EGGS
If figures don't lie, liars figure, I ween, With swift-writhing Ultimates no one has seenMany ions the milieu rule. Divalents are had, and trivalents are worse, Tctravalents, like Lanthanum, always a CUTS"--
For Dame Nature you never can fool.
Thus, statistical averages show that I'm rich, But my hank account proves that I'm broke.
JEROMI~ALEXANDER New: Edition, I d Eng. Cltem.
